Pardon my French

Much as I predicted before christmas, it seems Mitt Romney is almost certain to be selected as the Republican candidate for the 2012 elections, which is bad news for Obama, as he’s actually got some change of being elected…unlike the Tea Party candidates!

There seems to be a grim acceptance of this among Republicans, many of whom see Romney as a lightweight Republican. There are as they see it three certainties: Death, Taxes and Romney…and they’re working on getting rid of the first two!

Of course this reality is not to the liking of the Tea party…but then again reality isn’t really they’re thing! But they need to realise that none of their candidates, Ron Paul, Palin, Perry nor Bachmann were ever credible. It was the political equivalent of fantasy football. It would be like me proposing Ray Mears as PM of Britain and someone on the right countering by putting forward Jeremy Clarkson. Had any of the Tea Party candidates actually been selected, they would have seen the moderates unite behind Obama to stop this lunatic being elected. Even quite a few Republicans would have held their noses, gone into the polling booth and voted for Obama in order to keep them from power. As Bob Cesca recently pointed here and this republican blogger here many of the Tea party supporters, most notably Ron Pauls, are little more than a lunatic fringe and an embarassment to anyone with vaguely conservative views.

Even if a nutter like Ron Paul or Bachmann had made it to the White house, they’d have likely found a load of doctors in white coats brandishing a copy of the 25th amendment (that’s the bit of the US constitution that say’s Wacko’s can be removed from office and hauled of to the funny farm) and a Straitjacket. Our Tea Party president would have got to go to a big white house (where the nasty evil federal reserve can’t trouble him), just not the one he was aiming for!

But still the “tea party vote” is an important demographic in these primary’s. And there is no greater example of the extremes of stupidity the Tea Party candidates will go to than the recent attack on Romney over his involvement in the 2002 Winter Olympics. Have they unearthed proof that he was involved in the big bribery scandal there? No! Did he help cover up drug taking by athletes? No! His crime, in the eyes of the tea party, was to speak some schoolboy French (badly!) to some of his francophone guests 88| Gasp!

Now in any other country or any other party, demonstrating multi-lingual skills would be seen as a bonus. After all if you’re going to have to meet world leaders, it would be useful to know what they are saying, rather than relying on the translation “oh, my god, he looks even dumber than Bush, still is wife’s a babe, look at that ass” “Mr Le Presidente says you’re wife’s dress is very pretty”. John Huntsman was also attacked by the Cult of Ron Paul recently for apparently being able to speak Chinese.

Of course, Tea party members don’t want no folk who talk like funny foreign languages or nutin! Nor types with they’re fancy “degrees” and an “ed..u,,c” “e-d-u-c-a-t-i-o-n”. Why those types, like marry people other than their cousins, don’t spit indoors, nor drive pickup trucks, live in houses (rather than trailers), have “p-o-l-i-c-i-e-s” and use big words that make brain hurt! ;D In short, the tea party supporters want people as dump and bigoted as themselves. In essences they want to put the lunatics in charge of the asylum.

As moderates, all we can do is hope that Romney doesn’t get the nomination – Obama’s changes of re-election soar if he ends up facing a tea party candidate. Equally it’s possible the tea party, if the current craziness continues, might split the Republican vote. Ron Paul, whose economic polices I tore apart in this long post here, usually stands for nomination with the Republicans, looses, then stands for the Libertarian party. If he can drag a sizable number of the crazier Republicans over to the Libertarian camp it could easily give Obama a decent shot at re-election.

And if were Obama, I’d pander to these guys paranoia. Much as he and Kerry were swiftboated by Republicans he and the democrats could now get their own back by circulating copies of Romney’s birth certificate on the Internet (claiming he was born in Montreal) or how about faking a membership of the international petanque in his name? Doctor photos that showed him sitting next to Gérard Depardieu? Maybe sneak some snails onto the side of his campaign bus? :))

And least we forget, the Tea Party are largely a creation of Fox News. In its efforts to undermine Obama and the democrats, Murdoch may well have created a Frankenstein monster that will destroy both him and the GOP.


3 thoughts on “Pardon my French

  1. Pingback: The dangers of Populism | daryanblog

  2. Pingback: Where’s his birth certificate? | daryanblog

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